No need for fancy intro, it’s D&D time:
- Ciaran (LVL21) and Basile (LVL23)
- Kass (LVL22)
- Rhaegar (LVL 22)
- Alkaid (LVL 23)
- Dwayne (LVL 23)
- Lorn (LVL 23)
Back in Neebsenshire, Dwayne says the hook’s command word on accident while practicing and casts Gate. He goes through the portal and ends up in Mt. Celestia to meet with the rest of the group. After the group catches him up on everything, Dwayne pulls out a bottle and releases the crippled children souls into the air. He then gives everyone gifts since he’s been away so long:
- Alkaid is given razorwing feathers for her to fletch into arrows.
- Xylander is given a bundle of fish.
- Ciaran is given a book of recipes, with the first entry for Baklava.
- Marven is given a “One hour all you can eat buffet” coupon to Dwayne’s homeland.
- Rhaegar is given a pass into Dwayne’s family armory.
- Kass is given 20,000 gold because he’s a starving artist.
- Neebs is given a token for all you can drink at any bar in Dwayne’s homeland.
- Lorn is given a nice looking stick called the Wand of Smiles, but first Dwayne uses it on Rhaegar – who starts smiling uncontrollably.
- Basile is given a box and is told not to open it until they return to Neebsenshire.
Adajah returns after the battle and thanks them for their assistance. He warns them that the Unholy Crusade is continuing to destroy planes. He says they need to hunt down Mara and his crusade quickly.
Ciaran asks if they can speak with Bahamut to learn where the crusade is going, and offers to cook his favorite food. He learns from his new cookbook that Bahamut’s favorite food is starlight. Ciaran makes starshaped cookies in a pinch, and with a nat 20 Dwayne collects starlight for the dough.
The group meets with Bahamut and he thanks them for their assistance. He is amazed by the cookies and asks Dwayne to become his personal chef. Dwayne thinks about it and says he has more to do on the mortal plane before becoming his chef. Rhaegar asks if Bahaumt has a clue for where the Crusade is going, but they are outside of Bahamut’s sight. However, he says that they may be going to Carcery to gather more recruits for their army. Ciaran asks if he can talk to the god of Carcery, and Bahamut warns him that it’s an evil god not worth talking to. He also says that those who have lived criminal lives often end up in Carcery after death.
With their conversation over, Bahamut takes everyone back to Neebsenshire except Dwayne. When he’s alone, Basile opens up the box and sees a note inside. It reads that Dwayne is returning to his homeland to be the king, and that he is thankful for their assistance over the years. Dwayne’s message ends with “everyone deserves a second chance” and Basile sees the Amulet of Second Chances. Basile sends him a message wishing him luck before pocketing the amulet and joining Rhaegar, Kass, and Alkaid for their trip to the City of Brass.
Rhaegar and Kass meet with the Circle of Fire to give them news about the phoenix. The circle agrees to help the associates fight against Lucifer and provide additional information. A devil named Dustriul states that he has a friend in Carcery. His name is Zevir from the Orb of Othyrus.
Meanwhile, Basile roams around the city to try and learn more about the Unholy Crusade, as well as his own kind, from other tieflings in town. He enters The Howler’s Crag, a bar for tieflings. He goes up to the bar and drinks some firewater from the tiefling bartender. The two start talking and Basile learns that most tieflings know where their lineage leads, and Basile asks if there is a common ancestor. The bartender never mentions the name Lucifer. Then, word starts spreading about a giant eagle flying around town showing off it’s kill. Kass tells them that the eagle has Xylander, and Basile sends a message to Alkaid asking where she is. She says she is the eagle and comes to the bar. The group drinks, goofs around, and then heads back home with their lead.
Back at home, Rhaegar starts being belligerent at the bar so Basile smacks him behind the head with his glaive to knock him out. Kass casts Lullaby to make him fall asleep. Bubbles carries Rhaegar back to his home to rest.
Meanwhile, Alkaid surprises Ciaran by being an eagle. Ciaran is with the Addler family telling stories of their adventures and Alkaid comes into the house. Ciaran is excited about a giant eagle and rides her back. Ciaran convinces her to grab Tomas to ride and he freaks out. Ciaran attempts to control the eagle and she starts flying erratically. Basile hears their screams and flies up and yells at Alkaid to set them down. Tomas is shaken up and Ciaran is excited that Alkaid can become a bird.
Later that night, Lorn asks Alkaid to not erase Alexander Willard. When Alkaid says she’s can’t do that, since he destroyed her home, her people, and her body. Lorn says that Alexander Willard can die, he just needs to exist. Alkaid continues to press Lorn for any good reason to not erase him. Lorn asks Alkaid if her summoned selves are her or another potential path of hers. She says they are different version of herself. Lorn explains that Ioun showed him a dream that he is destined to become Alexander Willard, and that erasing him could possibly end the world. Although Alkaid is hurt by this revelation, she reluctantly agrees to not erase Alexander Willard.
In the morning, the group decide to take a small vacation from their hell to visit Dwayne. Chronos and Alkaid teleport them there. They check in on the archipelago ft Dwayne the Rocky Gnome Johnson. Rhaegar meets with Dwayne’s brother to visit the armory. He finds there is nothing there, and Rhaegar gives them money to start developing an armory. For his generous offer, Roland gives him the virtue of Charity. Roland also tells Rhaegar he needs to moderate his indulgences, so he makes a deal with Ciaran to make sure he doesn’t drink more than a 2-liter of alcohol a day.
When no one is looking, Alkaid takes Basile to Modelheim so they can check on it and see if they can find any other clues. All looks well, but the city looks industrialized. Alkaid tells Basile that she asked Dick Grayson to help watch over the town. As they walk around, they notice there are quite a few warforged walking around. Basile send a message to Skor to make sure everything is fine. Skor says the experiments are going great, and that he’s using the souls of people to make warforged. Basile clarifies if he’s using souls of people in Modelheim, and Skor assures Basile that Modelheim is safe. Basile asks him to check out the cavern to ensure the gate to Infernus is still frozen over.
The two return to Dwayne’s throne room, and Dwayne takes them back to Neebsenshire. As they pass through, he yells “SURVIVAL TEST” and the group drops 20 feet to the ground. Everyone flies or floats down safely.
They head to the Temple of Ioun and ask him to plane shift them to Carcery. Levi studies books on Carcery and prepares them. Before they go, Ciaran casts Scrying to learn more about Zevir so Basile can send him a message. Ciaran sees that Zevir is shaking hands with a seedy looking man in priest robes, and when Basile asks him to speak with them, he agrees and gives them a destination. Levi prays to Ioun and sends them to the appropriate place.
They arrive in a swampy area, where the sky is red and the wind carries whispers and songs of riches. Zevir is waiting for them with his pet hell hound: he appears as a very handsome human in a suit, but Rhaegar sees him as a Tormentor devil. Rhaegar asks Zevir if he knows anything about the Unholy Crusade and slips the name of Lucifer. Basile scolds him, but Zevir tells them that there is a jail break in Carcery. Rhaegar throws him money for more information, but Zevir laughs at it. When Rhaegar asks him where the jailbreak was, and Zevir avoids answering, Basile reads his mind and determines that it was in the orb they were currently visiting. Basile also catches the name of a soul that Zevir thinks is worth the Unholy Crusade’s efforts: Fraz-urb’luu. Basile recognizes him as the defeated demon prince that was trapped in Carcery and has been unable to escape. They continue to probe him for information until they learn there is a cell in Carcery where no one goes. After scaring Zevir into more information by revealing they can read his mind, he tells the group of a man who once convinced a blind man that he could see, and convinced a man with perfectly good legs to buy crutches. His words are so entrancing, that it’s said he convinces the gods to go to war. He tells them where they can find the cell.
The group heads to the cell of the prisoner, and Basile orders two scrolls of Mind Blank from Skor. Basile reads the scroll so Rhaegar is protected from any mind affecting magic. Rhaegar then gives most of his weapons to Basile to hold while he goes into the swamp.
After twenty minutes of walking, Rhaegar finds a small cave and knocks on the door. When no one replies, he shouts through the door. Two small knocks return. He continues shouting but doesn’t get much of a reply. He decides to open the door and steps back. Inside, he sees a man wearing strange clothes consisting of “jeans” and “flannel,” and he has a big beard and pointy ears. He introduces himself as Biff, and explains that he was put in Carcery because Lucifer twisted his words around when trying to bring peace to the gods. Rhaegar invites Biff to meet with the others.
When they approach, Rhaegar tells Biff to think that “we’re coming.” Biff thinks about Rhaegar ejaculating and Basile, who is listening for their return, immediately cries out and tries to scrub the image out of his mind. Basile carefully checks his mind and discerns that he means no harm to the group. They determine he’s worth escaping out of Carcery since he has beef against Lucifer and will help them. Upon the mention of Lucifer, Lorn appears and assesses Biff. He gives him a contract, and Biff officially joins Neebs and Associates. Lorn breaks the curse keeping Biff to Carcery.
During this time, Lorn has been crafting magic items in his own plane of existence. He performed a ritual to take the energy of demon to siphon into himself and Rocky. He also created Thrax, an undead version of himself.
The next day, the group meets by the well. Biff doesn’t show up, so Basile sends a message and tells him to meet up. Biff asks if they can meet at the house he built magically. Basile says it’s in the contract to meet at the well. Biff obliges and meets Rocky. He is impressed by Rocky and the two go for a race while the others try to figure out if they go after Mara or Fraz-urb’luu. Lorn reads the mind of Biff to learn more about Fraz-urb’luu to discern his location. Biff imagines him masturbating. Lorn casts modify memory. Biff imagines that he’s jacking someone else off. Lorn casts modify memory again. Biff imagines an orgy of people. Lorn discerns that the demon is in the abyss, likely in the badlands. The group prepare and buff themselves before plane shifting to him to battle.
- The group plane shifts into two groups: half near Mara and half near Fraz-urb’luu.
- Lorn casts Lion’s Charge and Rhino’s Rush as Rocky charges at Fraz-urb’luu. Mara casts Solarity to block Rocky with a Wall of Force, which Rocky counterspells with a Solarity and Wall of Force. Thus, he successfully charges into Fraz-urb’luu. The demon lashes at him with his spiked tails and grabs him. Rocky wails into him to deal over 1,000 damage. He still is standing, so Lorn flings arrows at the demon. The amulet around Fraz-urb’luu’s neck glows and a windwall blows the arrows away, but Lorn casts dispel magic to allow the arrows to pierce him. Lorn does the same to Mara, but he’s able to deflect the arrows.
- Frazzle Dazzle thrusts his hand into the air, and dark lighting strikes into the ground. He shouts in Abyssal, “Kostchtchie, assist!” With that, a hairless, yellow, 9-10 foot tall demon lord arrives. When he asks who summoned him, Frazzle says that the associates summoned him, and Costa Rica is pissed. Frazzle then continues to attack Rocky. Mara casts Chain Destruction on Rhaegar, Basile, and Ciaran. Basile’s deathward armor goes off and prevents him from instantly dying. Ciaran and Rhaegar pass their fortitude saves and take some damage. Through Ciaran and Basile’s bond, they don’t feel any pain. Lastly, Mara begins to study Rocky’s origin.
- Rhaegar throws Torch with Lightning Throw at Mara and strikes him. After several criticals, Torch returns and turns into a silvered weapon due to discerning Mara’s alignment. Bubbles moves to protect Biff.
- Basile fires off three eldritch blasts at Mara, two of which strike him. As Basile moves closer, he gives Ciaran his Wand of Lesser Restoration. Ciaran backs up and uses the wand on himself to heal Basile through their bond.
- Alkaid summons her army of selves. They fire at Costa Rica and Mara. As Mara is struck, one of his ring’s glows and heals him.
- Costa Rica summons three frost giants around Lorn and attack. Lorn casts Moment of Prescience, saving him from being hit by the war hammer as a white shield surrounds him. The frost giants cast Doom on Lorn, but he’s able to resist it. In response, he casts Evasculate.
- Biff casts Disintegrate on Mara, but he resists the affects. Biff then hides behind Bubbles again and casts Inflame the Righteous. Everyone has a fire shield around them.
- Lorn dismisses his Unicorn Heart spell and teleports 100 feet away. He then flings more arrows Mara. As he’s bleeding, his blood turns black and his horns grow. He shifts from his tiefling form into a devil form. Lorn uses his Belt of Battle to do it all over again. Rocky continues to wail on Frazzle Dazzle and as he attacks back, Rocky’s spikes start to glow and explode him backwards.
- Mara slaps his clawed hands together, and a greenish glaive manifests him and he strikes at Chronos. He banishes Chronos from the abyss as he says, “Mortal, I don’t feel so good.”
- Rhaegar uses Ancient Mountain Hammer and Strike of Perfect Clarity on Mara, whose horns crack from the attack.
- Ciaran casts Wraith Strike on Basile, who runs up to Mara and strikes with his glaive. He slices through Mara and strikes him through the chest and drives him down to his knees. Basile tells him that this was for Pythos, and Mara grins and laughs. As he realizes who has defeated him, he tells Basile that they lose. His blood seems to coagulate into a glob above him, and Fraz-urb’luu’s heart rips out of his chest and slams into the blood pool. Then the key rips out of Rhaegar’s bag and collides into it, and a sense of dread washes over everyone. They watch in horror as a portal to Infernus rips open.
- Ciaran runs forward and thrusts up the Amulet of Second Changes, shouting, “FOR DWAYNE!!!” The entire party feels an overwhelming sense of triumph as
- Lorn immediately casts Solarity to grab the heart and teleport it away. He then casts Greater Solarity to cast dimension door and offer assistance to Costa Rico to flee for his life. Costa Rica agrees and they disappear.
- With all demon princes away, Basile continues to attack Mara for a second time and kills him, saying proudly, “no, you lose.”
- Biff lifts up his triangle and strikes it. A vibrating green triangle smacks into Mara to disintegrate his body into dust.
After several moments of silences, Basile collapses to the ground. Rocky asks Biff telepathically, “Are we good?” and Biff tells him that everything is fine. Lorn heals Basile of his exhaustion and daze. The group then collects all of the loot, including the Heart of Mechanus, and returns home to rest.